Memory is a strange thing. Over the past months we have talked about Malia's life in China and have always gotten a response that mentions "airplane". Malia does not talk about her life in China, nor does she mention anything about our time in Beijing. She never mentions a parental figure, even though she was in foster care for most of her life. I find this rather interesting, because all the children that I know who were adopted at the age of 3 or older do talk about their past experiences. On the one had it is a good thing because we are not dealing with a child who constantly mentions and grieves for the lost loved one. On the other hand I do worry a bit. I'm not sure if Malia just simply does not remember, or if she does not want to. I wonder if at some point she will remember and then it may be that much more difficult to deal with.
In the past if we showed Malia pictures of our trip to Beijing, she would be up at all hours of the night, and seemed out of sorts during the day. Yesterday we showed her the pictures of the day we finally met her. She seemed excited and interested . . . and she slept through the night! I hope this is a turning point. We really want the whole adoption experience to be as natural as any other experience Malia has. It was and continues to be an amazing journey that we treasure in our hearts and we desperately want Malia to feel the same way!
2 comments:
Cute pictures! Love the pink! I am sure she will remember what she wants to and talk about it when she is ready. I found even Lilah at two years old, would talk about things or switch her ideals on certain things when she was ready. I do think she has forgotten for the most part though. I guess they do what they have to to protect themselves emotionally.
What a cutie!!! Kids grieve in very different ways. Fenway has shut off anything to do with adoption where Caden has such a need to tell us everything about his past life. But when both my kids see gotcha day pictures, they both tell that was a sad day. And for them it was.
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