Thursday, October 4, 2012
As you know I have been stressed lately, although I am slowly learning to once again give it all over to God. You would think that with all the stress we have encountered, giving everything to God would be easy. It's not. I'm still learning, I'm still growing, and of late I have gotten downright excited to see God at work!
One of the greatest stresses has been financial. I HATE talking about finances! It makes me feel like a whiner. Makes me feel like I'm ungrateful. Martin and I have rarely let anyone know when we have a need. Too much pride perhaps. Asking for help goes against every fiber in our beings. We like to do things ourselves. We do not like to put our burdens on others. Perhaps it is the fear of not being heard...the fear of being ignored. We would much rather help others. It is much easier to ask for something when it is going to someone else...and much more fun!
However, the fact remains...with our third adoption well on it's way...(we hope to travel sometime late this winter or early spring)...we still have no idea as to how we will pay for it all. We had thought that I would be working this fall...as much as possible. However, due to homeschooling Alex, it is impossible for me to work.
We will be selling a bunch of our personal belongings, which should help quite a bit. But it still won't be nearly enough. We do have some ideas for fundraisers. We're just not 100% sure what God wants. At this point we are praying for clear direction. We do not know how God will provide, but we do know God NEVER fails!
Today my heart rejoices! I am at peace. I know God will provide. This past week we were given $3100! Yah! Blows me away! A huge part of that money was not necessarily given directly towards our adoption, but that is what it will be used for. Curiousity got the best of me, so I decided to to a little math. So far we have spent $5932.89 on our adoption. This covers our homestudy, Citizenship application, postage, photos and agency fees. We have been given/earned $4873.91! This includes the amount I earned in subbing, selling bread; money from the oncewaslost fundraiser, and money from some VERY generous people! That leaves only a difference of $1058.98! My heart soars! I could leap for joy! We are so,so very blessed! We know how hard these people have worked to help us bring our little guy home. I am in tears. There are no words to adequately describe our gratitude. We are humbled. We are in awe. We are blessed!
I came across this song on a blog I follow and simply had to share it. It so accurately describes my heart. May you be blessed by it as well.